Dear Poly,
With a baby on the way, will Brad and Angelina begin a new chapter together?
Concerned in Oregon
Well Concerned,
That's an important question,
but first, may a drive a fucking stake through your eye and make it come out of your ear? Because- who really gives a fuck?
Dear Poly,
Who does your hair, It's so sleek and well groomed,
Sincerely,
Your Mother
Aww Mom,
You've always been so good to me, but if I told you,
I'd have to kill you- so don't ask.
PS, I tried to visit you for your birthday, but the guards turned me away-
I guess your back in solitary again? Who'd you beat up now?
Love your son,
Polyman2.
Howdy Poly,
Is it true that Brokeback Mountain, one of this century's most important and poignant movies, was actually based on real life events?
I just loved everything about that movie-
What emotion! What depth! What penis!
Your little doggie,
Brett Brickbutt (Binghole, Montana)
Whoa Brette,
This is hot! You put your finger on it, and it felt good!
Brokeback Mountain is actually based on a real life situation that happened way back in 1825 by none other than that wild west hero, Buffalo Bill Cody and the big Indian Chief Sitting Bull.
Now you may think that's a lot of bull, but no shit- it's true, and they actually got married. And guess where they full filled their vows? That's right- you guessed it- Brokeback Mountain, Wyoming- a gay (or back in cowboy times -pansy) resort.
It's a gripping tail of love, yearning, horse riding, bj's, cornholing, humming, yodeling with your mouth full, sadness, loss, sheep, dick jokes...
all the elements of a great 21st century reality show!
We'll, I hope I answered your question- you queer son of a bitch!
Keep in touch,
Poly. xxx
ps. I'm not gay
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14 comments:
Here's a question for you: Is Alex Trebek ever going to grow another moustache?
mm- An excellent question. Al (as he is known) had to shave because he got lip crabs from one of those smart skanky bitches he likes to poke. He says he will grow it back though, quote Alex, "Now it tickles when I go down."
video x: Great to hear from you-
Thanks for your kind words. You know, being new to this Q & A thing
I have to handle my answers with a certain finese- the stake thing, I beleive, is right to the point.
Dear Poly,
Do you ever go naked? I bet you would look hot and I am almost positive you would love the freedom from that heavy looking clothing ;)
Ask Poly, huh?!
Great blog theme!
Please don't talk about homo's though, it scares me. The thought of men being intimate with other men just freaks me out. Chicks on chicks that's totally different, us chicks are just naturally the hotter sex. It's only normal that it'd be super sexy to see two chicks get it on.
Lee Ann: I completely agree with you; as a matter of fact, I'm naked right now as I type this- and I do love the freedom, but my butt and the hanging thing do get a little sticky on this polyvinyl chair.
Becky- No serious gay talk here- strictly hetero! I only do manly things and wear a sword and tool belt intermitently to prove it.
and I am no stranger to the 2 girl thing- if 1 is good then 2 is great!
...and I love your visits, my little Shannon.
what Morbid said...ditto
Ok Poly, I am ready for you to show me that you are a man of the world! ;)
i am leaving my kid on your doorstep, if your so hot, you'll see that he gets taken care of. after all, he's your kid too. i expect to see him in about 20 years, so ya better do a good job. drank a glass of water figure i'm ready for the desert. i'm bringing along your dog, he's always good for a laugh.
p.s. good to know yer off the wagon.
your greatfully,
Hairlip
brad/jenn/jolie/george w/gumby see?
lee ann; have you met Shannon? I was thinking, perhaps us three, well you know what I mean...I promise, I'll be gentle. (Of course Becky and Jasmine are invited also)
Hairlip: I knew this day would come, so here it is: I will raise the boy and call him Hetero. He will be a man amoung men and woman will worship him for the God he is- for he is son of Poly!
Wish you didn't take the dog- Old shithead was my favorite.
Any way, I drink to you and your depravity.
PS Watch out for rattlers.
Captain Carl Action Figure- About time your scrawny ass made an appearance! I think your popularity is based on the fact that your made of plastic and stretch in all the right places.
Take the muffin and slice it horizontally in 3 equal sections, apply butter and toast for 10 minutes.
Poly, aren't you the little handsome devil!!!!
Poly, pray do tell how an eye can possibly be driven through an ear? i am fairly sure from my physiology class that the eye is at a 45 degree angle to the ear. so unless your stake is boomerang shaped i am afraid the math just doesn't work.
You're welcome...
Hey Poly,
Obviously you've never hung out with Mr. Trebek...
Like, I'm so drunk right now, Trebek can kill a badger with a nasty look...
Sorry, Satan commands me to sacrifice my tongue. You know, he needs that shit. Oh well. Late...
Jungle Jane-
you see, the trick is to jam it in then force th 45 degree angle. You make it work!
Morbid- Got me, I tried bluffing,
no- I don't know him- but it doesn't mean I'm a fake...
and I've been meaning to talk to you about your drinking-
always let it interfere with your life.
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